Rainbow Punch Destruction

Whenever I think back to my childhood many fun-filled memories, times, and characters come flooding into mind. One of the beloved characters of lore is none other than the large, lovable, wall-bustin' Kool-Aid Man. But as we all can attest to time has a way of changing people. Yes here at RUMPaholicA we have dove deep and uncovered the E! True Hollywood Story of Kool-Aid Man. Kool-Aid Man made millions during the commercial heyday of the 80's when blatant sugar soaked marketing aimed at children was still allowed . However by the late 90's all that energetic wall-busting began to take it's toll on Kool-Aid's physic. That mixed with a deadly addiction to sugar and a 5 lbs. a day crushed Ice habit, which drastically doomed his mind. Today we find Kool-Aid holed up in his Super8 motel room refusing to even bust walls or utter his million dollar catch phrase,. And before we here got a hold of him for this story the only person he would see was a 16 yr. old Korean prostitute named Sun-Gi whom he paid with his own special mix of Rock-a-dile Red to insure she stirred him constantly with a large wooden spoon. So sad, so we beg of you when each and every one of you go to sleep tonight think of Kool-Aid Man and his unfortunate self destruction, Snapple be damned.

Cerebral Snapshots

Okay so honestly we all know I don't always stay all that much sober on these weekends, that said, plus now throw in the fact that we feel all that pictures in general are a tool used mainly for coercion and extortion , or tabloids. (really depends on the type of whore you are ) what remains is the recounts of the torrent lifestyles of the rich and worthless and the guy who happens to be here to report it. So in Retrospect: Vodka is king, Everyone thinks life is hard, and yes, tomorrow is another day. So Raise your glass,.. and forget.

Darth Macadamian

Honestly what red-blooded American male in my generation doesn't love Star Wars? Admit it, we all tried to use the Force (and still try) and we all made those awesome blaster sounds on the playground, and some of us even enjoy to refer to our penis as our "Lightsaber" (okay maybe that last one is just me) Regardless Star Wars is a major part of our pop culture today, especially now that a whole new generation has been saturated with the not-as-good but still enjoyable prequel trilogy. Personally I was always a huge Darth Vader fan... I mean come on, Luke was a sister-kissing pussy. And how can you beat Force Choking officers and freezing people in liquid Carbonate! That's right, you can't. (plus he knocked up Natalie Portman too) So this week's Tshirt winner is to pay homage to the Dark Sith Lord himself. And hey, as if you really needed another reason to join up with the Dark Side... now they even offer cookies! Just imagine, Red Lightsaber in one hand and double fudge Macadamian Nut Cookie in the other, Die Rebel Scum Die!