Ten things I've learned this week:

1. don't eat oysters from Hooters no matter how hot your server is
2. the no diving sign near the hot tub is there for a reason
3. my exgirlfriend Jamie is a sucker for abuse and for that she deserves it
4. frozen pizza and Family Guy are probably the two best things in the world
5. open bar + ryan = one wild night
6. I love church girls (especially Brazilian ones)
7. Interstatal Applebees shots are fun for all involved
8. just because it looks like cheese and smells like cheese it might not be cheese
9. Hurricanes suck
10. always bet on black